On Facebook today my niece's status said that Dettol had solved all her problems for the time being. Well it's nice to know that problems can be so easily solved, if temporarily, by something from a bottle.
Daddy was a great believer in Dettol. Maybe his Milroy's disease had given him a horror of all bacteria or perhaps it was his childhood years of poverty and grime that led him to wage such war. The bottle of brown liquid, smelling strongly of - well, to my childhood nose, of hygiene and cut knees - was heaved out on a very regular basis.
Got a scratch or cut knee? Dettol was the answer. Mosquito bite? Swab with Dettol. Sore throat? Gargle with Dettol. Daddy discovered that it dealt with mildew very effectively. A few drops in the bath and you knew you were clean all over. Generally it was far too strong to be used neat. It was diluted with water, whereupon the water turned a milky colour, reminiscent of Pernod. Dettol was dropped onto the lint that went under bandages and plasters. We washed our hands after a day on public transport (the "polio wash" Daddy called it) with a drop of Dettol in the water.
I'm surprised Daddy didn't think of selling us as advertising, we used so much. The bottle itself sported a green shield with a massive sword slicing through the middle. No wonder we believed in its power to defend us.
Daddy may have taken this belief a little too far. When he found himself suffering from a gastric ulcer which didn't respond to the then merely palliative treatment involving the consumption of very bland food, he took charge. He decided to have a daily drink of Dettol. I believe he did dilute it before consumption. Now he was really clean, inside and out. In one way his instinct was right (we now know that most gastric ulcers are caused by Helicobacter Pylori and the treatment is antibiotics) and the ulcers did clear up, never to return. Triumphantly, Daddy continued to uphold Dettol's rule in the household. (I believe we had a dalliance with potassium permanganate crystals for mouth ulcers, but it didn't last.)
Years later, he developed pyloric stenosis which was caused by massive scar tissue from his old gastric ulcer, and required invasive surgery. So Dettol had its revenge.
Personally, I won't let Dettol near my skin as it brings me out in a rash, but continue to believe in its ability to keep my worktops clean and walls free of mildew.
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