Law & Order

Today

The kitties have been rather unruly today. Earlier they discovered, like the Andrex puppy, how to pull down all the toilet roll . That must have surprised them.

During lunch, while we were trying to stop Albinoni climbing onto the table and eating the pickled onions, Agnes was exploring the joys of playing with the fineline blind cords and finding out just how much they can be tangled up. Albinoni punctured Paul's legs trying to clamber up and he's learning how to avoid the trusty water spray used as a deterrent.

"They should be called 'The Bash St Kittens'", said Paul, half amused, half exasperated.

In My Day

At one time I really thought that I was going to become a teacher. In secondary schools, what's more. As part of my training I had to do teaching practice. In theory this was managed on-the-job work experience. What happened in reality was that you were given all the rubbish classes.

In the Summer of 1970, I was allocated to a Roman Catholic school in Bexhill. (An interesting choice given my lack of religious commitment.) I didn't mind managing sulky 15-years olds, but I met my match when I had to take the art class for a remedial group of 11-year olds. Nowadays they would be described as have "learning" or "behavioural" "difficulties" and receive special treatment. Then it was just the class all teachers avoided.

And I soon understood why. At first the class went all right, if a bit raggedly and we got some painting done. One little boy (and he was only a tiddler) threw something or other on the floor and I told him to pick it up. When he refused I spoke to him sharply.

His response was to start chucking art materials all over the room. Soon the rest were joining in, throwing brushes and paint pots out of the window and ripping paper. The floor was covered in multi-coloured rivers of paint and the noise was hideous. I had no idea how to restore calm and in the middle of it the bell went and all the children rushed, whooping with joy, out of the room.

I spent the next hour retrieving items from the playground and trying to clean up. And I felt too ashamed to put my head round the staffroom door.

Perhaps I should have used the water spray treatment on them!